TeenLit Community Forums  

If this is your first visit, be sure to check out the FAQ by clicking the link above. You may have to register before you can post: click the register link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below.

Go Back   TeenLit Community Forums > Writing > Long Term Writing
User Name
Password
Register FAQ Guidelines Members List Calendar Search Today's Posts Mark Forums Read

Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 05-21-2005, 03:05 PM   #1
~swissmochafudge~
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 156
Default "Scribble"

My feelings flow from pen to paper,
Letting go of all the anger,
Watching teardrops stain the paper,
Emotion falling, flying faster.

Hidden wounds that ooze my pain,
I want to close them,
Walk away.

I SCREAM!
My mouth a gaping hole,
I cannot see,
I cannot feel.

I wage a battle with myself,
You made me a prison
You shut me inů

Do I loathe me?
Do I love me?

Tell me true!
~swissmochafudge~ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-21-2005, 03:10 PM   #2
Jake251
TeenLit Regular
 
Jake251's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 82
Default

Great job! I can feel all the emotions you are expressing! GREAT!
__________________
"On cable TV they have a weather channel -- 24 hours of weather. We had something like that where I grew up. We called it a window."
Jake251 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-26-2005, 03:58 PM   #3
xXxTigerEyesxXx
TeenLit Newbie
 
xXxTigerEyesxXx's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 23
Default

Okay, Great Job, but all your poems that I have read involve tears, and paper... I think I'm seeing a pattern here... but otherwise, GREAT!
__________________
~*~ ~*~
xXxTigerEyesxXx is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2005, 09:46 AM   #4
~swissmochafudge~
Senior Member
 
Join Date: May 2005
Posts: 156
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by xXxTigerEyesxXx
Okay, Great Job, but all your poems that I have read involve tears, and paper... I think I'm seeing a pattern here... but otherwise, GREAT!

Really?? They Do!!!??! Lol, don't mind me, but what about "Dusk" and "Nightmare" not to metion "The Runaway"?? Thanks for the feedback though!!

~Mocha~
~swissmochafudge~ is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2006, 03:42 PM   #5
girlonfire
TeenLit Regular
 
girlonfire's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 72
Default ?

its weaker than most ure other work...but more real, raw, how i like it - none of this william blake wanna b non sense ( which u usually do)...good lord save me....its alright....a scribble...wel named
__________________
I'm like an atom,
So small you can not see me,
Insignificant?
Try and split me,
And i'm not so little anymore...
girlonfire is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 10:37 AM.


Powered by vBulletin Version 3.5.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2006, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.

EMS Chat
EMS News