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herrshuster · 05-08-2006, 12:13 PM

well if you want review, i think it's ok, but the writing is bland. "it was", "there were", etc. Try and spice up the language a bit.

05-08-2006, 12:13 PM	#3
herrshuster TeenLit Newbie Join Date: May 2006 Posts: 25	well if you want review, i think it's ok, but the writing is bland. "it was", "there were", etc. Try and spice up the language a bit.